Archive for romance

Romance in Marriage Begins in the Mind

Posted in romance with tags on January 6, 2009 by swingantho

Some of the most successful swingers have the strongest marriages. My husband and I have been married for over 20 years and we are each other’s best friend. Swinging is something we do for fun, but it wouldn’t work if we didn’t have a successful marriage.  If swinging is the only thing keeping your marriage together – you shouldn’t be swinging.  


Romance in Marriage Begins in the Mind

The most powerful romance doesn’t begin with physical action, but rather with mental contemplation and expectation. It starts with a simple idea or fantasy that develops into closer intimacy between two connected partners. Having a satisfying romantic relationship with your husband or wife takes some thought and leg work, but it doesn’t have to be burdensome. In reality, becoming a romantic person can be fun, exciting and fulfilling for you and your spouse.

And if you’re truly committed to making it work, romance will become second nature for you. All you need is:

+ a willing heart to invest the time,

+ access to a computer,

+ and maybe a little creativity.

If you’re a little skeptical, don’t worry, I started with only one of the three too. Here are three keys that have worked for my husband and me.

1. Romance of the mind begins when the sun comes up, not after it goes down. If you want have a successful romance with your husband or wife, start the day thinking about what your partner likes or wants most. Maybe it’s a specific request, a deed, or a special gift. Doesn’t have to be fancy, but it does need to be relevant to your relationship. Drop hints throughout the day to build expectancy. Some suggestions are short and sweet (or sexy) notes, photos, or voice/text messages. The idea is to show that you’re listening, to give your honey a sense of desirability and to build up his/her receptiveness for affection. (Notice I did not say sex per se.)

2. Romance of the mind is ritualistic, not boring or repetitive, but endearing. I recently read an article about couples who love having fun with each other. The one thing that they all had in common was that they had certain rituals that they enjoyed doing together. When you have a certain ritual that you and your partner share, it gives you something to look forward to throughout the day, week, month or year.

Something my husband and I do to wind down our day is chat over tea, coffee, or chocolate (in the winter) and smoothies (in the summer). Sometimes we have music in the background, sometimes not. Sometimes it leads to more, sometimes not. But this practice has gotten us through some tough times spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally and even professionally.

3. Romance of the mind is well-planned but has a feeling of spontaneity. One of the movies that I truly enjoyed this year was Hitch. He had a way of making romance look easy, but he wasn’t perfect. He planned, but he wasn’t rigid. And when his plans fell apart, he could go with the flow. If only we all could be so talented. I’ll let you in on a little secret: the good news is that we can.

Just plan around what you and your wife or husband like doing. If you like elaborate evenings for two, go for it. If you love to travel, there are plenty of romantic places to see. If you like staying home and playing board games– there are plenty of nice (and some naughty) ones out there. Just plan and see where you’ll end up.

When we lived in Brooklyn, my husband and I used to plan walking dates in Prospect Park (the Central Park of Brooklyn) or near the water along lower Manhattan. We’d have our meeting time and place, but no specific agenda in mind. Sometimes we heard musicians. Sometimes we just enjoyed nature. One time we even had an unexpected fireworks show. It was spectacular against the purple glow cast on the water. I was certain that he knew about it. He denies it to this day.

Hope this post inspires you to make an effort and draws you closer to your spouse.

Keishia Lee-Louis’ work has appeared on,, and in numerous other publications. Currently, she is writing a book on marriage and relationships(Spring 2006). If you’d like to see more of her work, visit

The Romantic Strip Tease

Posted in Sex with tags , , on December 5, 2008 by swingantho

The Romantic StripTease!


Have you ever fantasized about being a stripper? Have you ever thought it would be cool to do a striptease for your lover? Well, guess what? You’re not alone!

Truth be told, many women have this same fantasy. Many more have even “busted a move” for their lover. Sound like fun? It sure is! Plus, the Romantic Striptease is an awesome way to show your lover just how sexy you’re feeling. And take it from me, he will agree with you 100%.

Of course anytime you remove your own clothes in front of your lover there’s sure to be “fireworks”. But lets do something special. Let’s treat your lover. Let’s plan an actual Romantic Striptease.

So, what’s needed to make the Romantic Striptease a success? Let’s have a look.

First and foremost, as mentioned in my book “the Romantic Tips Guide” you do not have to be a professional dancer to do this. It’s all about having fun and spending some quality time with each other!

Next, is music selection. Keep in mind you and your partners taste. The music you choose needs to be a bit on the slow side. Not too slow and draggy, but slow enough so you will be able to take your time removing your clothes one piece at a time and really Tease.

Speaking of clothing, you’ll have to plan what to wear. And, you won’t need to go shopping either. Well…not unless you want to. 😉 It is best to start off fully dressed. After all it is called a “Strip TEASE”. Removing layers is much more fun, and exciting. A sexy dress, or blouse and skirt, choose an outfit that always turns your partner on. You know, the one where he just can’t keep his hands off you. Then for underneath that, choose a couple more things. A pretty camisole, over a sexy bra. On the bottom put a pair of sexy skimpy panties over a pair of thongs. Eventually you’ll be removing it all, one piece at a time. Remember, anything that drive’s your sweetie wild, and whatever makes you feel sexy and desirable is in order here. You can pretty much choose whatever’s in your closet for the outer layer. A good, “naughty” choice is always the schoolgirl look, or you could go for the button-down business look. A tie would later make a great prop. Just think about looping it behind his head to pull him into your breasts.

Then accessorize. This includes anything like glasses, hats, ties, as well as the all-important thigh highs, (or garter belt and stockings) and stiletto heels. Just make sure you can actually move around and dance in those stilettos. If you don’t have any in your closet, borrow a pair from a friend. Also long necklaces look amazing when you’re down to the bare essentials, plus long gloves and feather boas are great accessories too.

Place a chair some where in your bedroom where you will have easy access to move all around it. Of course it’s for your sweetie to sit on and watch as you dazzle him with your StripTease. Also, chill some of your lover’s favorite beverage. Wine or champagne would be great. You could have some fresh fruit like strawberries or grapes to feed your lover as you dance up a storm. Just remember to take it slow and easy.

When the time comes to do your Romantic StripTease remove one piece of clothing at a time, making sure to linger on each piece. Give it a try, I promise you and your lover will have great fun. Oh yeah and great sex as well!

Best Of Luck!

Marie Clare

About the Author:

Marie Clare specializes in writing about Dating Relationships and Romance. Check out her lastest Best Selling eBook “the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook” plus reviews of the Best Online Dating Sites FREE Articles Tips and Advice at

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